Just when I think I'm on top of things

I really did believe that I was getting the hang of our routine. Kids, work, school, sports, family, and the like. I thought I had it all under control. It is funny how life comes along two hours before trick-or-treating and turns it all around for you!

I don’t know when they started, but sometimes I would have spells that caused my head to thump really loudly when I went from sitting to standing or vice versa. I didn’t pay much attention to them until last week when the thumping was accompanied by migraine-like pain. Not taking migraines lightly, but by Wednesday the pain was about 15 times that of a migraine. It was strange, only hitting me sporadically when I was transitioning from sitting to standing and then the thumping and pain would go away; always worse in the morning and practically disappearing in the evening. Like a good girl, I thought it was weird so I decided it was worth checking out, my oncologist agreed and emailed me a script for a brain MRI which I promptly scheduled for the soonest date available at our local hospital, Saturday.

On Thursday during one of the headaches I got sick in my office trash can and in the process felt a pop in my left hip. Although I made it to both boys Halloween Parties that afternoon, I could hardly walk when I returned to work. Over the last couple of years the popping and pain are things I have come accustomed to but this time was different. After a lot more pain and a trip to the local Emergency Room, we found out my pelvis is fractured.

The ER plan was to keep the pelvis stable until it could be reviewed by the Orthopedic Oncologist who put the rod in my femur in 2008. Once again Brad was helping me in and out of bed, in and out of the shower, and in and out of the chair. Well, that WAS the plan as of Sunday morning.

I went ahead with the MRI on Saturday and on Sunday my family doctor called to say the MRI had been read and the radiologist had called him. Yeah. I have a cancerous lesion on my brain, the cerebellum at the base of the brain. After about a half dozen calls and e-mails, I had a steriod perscription. This morning (Monday) my oncologist called with an appointment at 1:30pm in Baltimore with the Neurosurgeon so he could see the Mri film on CD's. She told me to be prepared to be admitted for surgery so I quickly packed a suitcase and got ready. (Well, I admit I really dont' move quickly, but whatever). I really liked the surgeon especially when he said they see this in metastic breast cancer, it can be removed, and they have a lot of success. But he did say that it needs removed in the next two weeks, we can't wait four. Special thanks to Glen and Cindy for driving all the way out here this morning to take Trent to school and Ian to their house. And special thanks to my dad who drove me to Hopkins, navigated a wheelchair through the parking garages, buildings and offices!

The Neurosurgeon sent me home with instructions to contine the steriods and his secretary was busy planning my preoperative set up next Tuesday (November 9th) and brain surgery on Wednesday (November 10th). That said, he wants clearance from my Orthopaedic Surgeon because the surgery on my brain will be perfomed face-down and he wants to be sure the hip won't break when they flip me. So at some time they will have to address the hip too. As far as the brain goes, I may need to have radiation as well. I'm guessing this will all lead to a change in drugs too, like chemo. For now though, I cannot drive and I have to keep my pelvis as stable as possible. If you know me, you understand that sitting at home in a filthy house is NOT what I do best but I will do it.

Tomorrow is a new day and I have a list of questions for a list of people. So I will work on that then! Thanks to Glen and Cindy again for making the treck out here to pick up Trent for school again tomorrow and sending home chicken noodle soup. Thanks to my co-worker and friend, Aly for driving out here with a pumpkin pie the other night! And thanks to my boss, Steve and his wife for the food and drinks tonight! The brownies were a big hit!

I know everyone will be concerned and I know from past experience that you want to help. I know in the next couple of weeks there will be many things we will need and I just need to catch my breath and get organized. I appreciate everyone's text messages, I really do and I apologize that I can't answer all of them, but I do read them and SO much appreciate all your words of support! Please know I will let you know when we need help and what we may need. If you have specific questions the best thing this week is to just e-mail me and feel free to pass along this blog address to those who might be interested. Brad is wiped out from trying to do everything and talking on the phone around here has always been a challenge and most of what I have to say or explain is bigger than a text message. I will try to keep this blog updated when I get information too!

Right now we just really need prayers. They have never failed me before!!

My secret obsession

Until today I haven't posted for almost a month. Don't be concerned. I usually think of topics while doing something not condusive to typing like driving my car, sitting in a meeting, or working in the yard. Although my head is full of topics, I just haven't had the time to write much lately. Typically at the end of the day, after tucking the boys in, I sit in bed with my laptop. After I check my e-mail and the school website, I write. One reason I haven't written lately is that I have been doing a lot of writing at work so I haven't felt much like writing in the evenings. But, my main reason is my secret obsession.

I got hooked a long time ago and I have spent the last several years avoiding it. I know myself and I know that I will stay awake long after the house is silent with my lamp on. I tell myself that I will turn the lights out at a reasonable hour but somehow the suspense pulls me in and before I know it the clock is blaring the numbers that remind me I will be walking around half comotose the next day. I am jealous of those who can set a limit, turn out the light, and forget about it until the next evening. If you haven't figured it out yet, I will openly admit it. I am addicted to reading books.

For a while the hundreds of chidrens books on our shelves were good enough. I have Scholastic books for all seasons, holidays, and events. I was thrilled last year when I started reading 'chapter' books to the boys every evening. The boys and I have read some classics and some new books and I get all giddy when they are excited about a book that I loved as a child! Sure I also have a stack of magazines and health books, but there is nothing like reading for fun.

My friend Aly lent me a book when we went to the beach in May. I finished it in less than two days. I am not a fan of fiction or smut, rather, I just like a good old fashioned story. That is what hooks me in and keeps me up late! I have been through several books since then and have a new book staring at me as I write this. I am going to try to read it a little bit at a time, but I know how it will go....somehow my nights will get shorter and I will be really tired!

This is one obsession I would like to pass along to Trent and Ian!!

Fall

Fall reminds me that I will never live somewhere that doesn't have four seasons. I don't know if I can pinpoint one particular thing about fall that makes me love it so much. I think it is a culmination of so many things from the cool crisp air and the leaves floating down from the sky to the excitement over Halloween costumes and trick-or-treating.

This year has been especially fun because both boys were so excited to open up the box of fall decorations and spread them throughout the house. Ian enjoyed watching all our mums bloom after watering them all summer and Trent couldn't wait to carve a pumpkin.

Last Sunday, after both boys were particularly good in church, we stopped by a farm market so they could pick out their pumpkins. Of course, we also left with three gourds, a group of Indian corn, and one mum. That afternoon they were so excited to carve their pumpkins and we were ready to get started when I realized I had hidden the carving tools so well that neither Brad or I could find them. I remembered tucking the away thinking, 'I won't think to look here but I will remember.' So on Monday when I had purchased new tools I found them. Typical!

Last Monday night we had a totally spooktacular time complete with mummy hot dogs, eyeball pasta and apple cider before cutting into the pumpkins! I finished the costumes last week, and we spent this Saturday afternoon in Martinsburg watching the Apple Harvest Parade. After church on Sunday, the boys went outside and I sat down and watched some football! This morning we marveled at how many trees had changed color on 'our' mountains as we drove into town while the sun was rising. So many wonderful things are going on this time of year.

Fall is here and I love it!!