My tribute

When I was in 6th grade I had my first crush on a tall thin freckle faced 7th grader. In high school we became an item for a while and while I was away at college we would get together for dinner every so often. When I moved back to the area, we met up again and Brad and I got married on July 7, 2002. Our lives always led us back to each other. If that isn't divine intervention, I don't know what is.

We were soul mates. Boy we could make each other mad, but we sure laughed ourselves through some rough times. We could sit across the room, and with one look, know exactly what the other was thinking. We would sit on the front porch after the kids went to bed and solve all the world's problems. When my mom died I was devastated and he stood beside me, quietly being my support. He gave me two wonderful boys who will always remind me of him.

Eight years ago today, while Brad was flying back from business in Germany, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. When he got home, he looked at me and said, "Don't worry. It will be OK. We will get through this together." After my diagnosis, he found himself with many responsibilities that no new husband should have to do. But he did them. He knew when to hug me and when to give me some space. But most importantly he knew when to kick me in the butt, remind me when to stop feeling sorry for myself, and to get on with it! He got used to sudden plan changes when my cancer would flare up and I would often tease him about picking a lemon like me. Then we would laugh and move on!

It is easy to make promises, but Brad was a testament to keeping them. To a friend, a neighbor, a relative, a friend of a friend, it didn't matter. He was always ready to solve a problem of fix a need. Last night so many people turned out to give their condolences. My boys and I were so proud to see how many people cared about Brad. I hope it creates a memory for them that will last their entire lives.

People keep telling me how strong I am. To be honest, I think my strength came from him. He was my pillar of strength. He is still with me as he will forever live in my heart and in the hearts of the boys. We are soul mates, connect on a level that a lot of people don't understand. And I still feel him with me. I will miss those strong arms around my shoulders and now I will laugh alone. But I see him in the eyes of my children and he will help us through each day.

Thanks to everyone for their thoughts and prayers. I cannot thank my brothers, Don and Scott, and their wives Jackie and Brittany enough for putting their lives on hold and helping with so many details. To my dad who lost his father when he was 9 and has weathered the death of my mom. He has been a total comfort, sounding board, and source of information to us. I am thankful for Brad's parents and sister who have been so supportive and helpful. And to all the people who have brought food, mowed grass, filled the water softener, helped me clean. I just can't say 'thank you' enough for all the help I have received.

It is time for me to take a deep breath and get ready for the day.

Brad, you will always be my heart and I will love you forever.